There is, actually. I own a EOT/D player's guide, so I checked that to make sure. It matches the color of aura on the personality test, which (usually) matches the favorite color chosen on the DS. I say usually because for some reason I kept getting pink when my result was sassy.

And what better person than bacon to play the part of a whimsical and diabolically insane 'grand master of all things bad'?

I apologize for the delay in posting! I had to do a bit of catch-up work on the story so that it was up to date enough with the script, so I wouldn't risk being a few days behind. This might mean chapters may get posted a bit slower than normal, though I still want to aim for the 2-per-week guideline.

Without further ado, let me bring you chapter 3!

~~~

[Back to Top]



The next morning couldn’t come soon, enough. Wait, yes it did. I remember being nice, cozy, and content lying on the straw bed, enclosed in a comfortable blackness that we call sleep, when I’m interrupted by an extremely loud voice that makes my ears start ringing.

“HEY! HEY THERE! RISE AND SHINE!”

The blackness became muddled and distorted as I slowly opened my eyes. I was clutching my ludicrously floppy ears with my hands as I was blinking the scenery into focus. I was staring at the ceiling when everything came into view, as I was sleeping on my back.

“...what the heck was that...” I mumble, groggily, tripping over a few of the syllables.

“Why are you still ASLEEP?! WAKE UP!”

“Ugh... Next time, could you lower the volume a bit? My ears are really sensitive...” Even more sensitive now in this body, actually. The pain and ringing I felt within my head was indescribable.

“C’mon! Snap OUT of it!”

“I’m working on it, dangit!” I roll onto my side and try to push myself up to a standing position. It doesn’t completely work, and I’m just kneeling on one knee instead. My eyes are still only half-open so I couldn’t totally focus, but whoever woke us up was blue and had a big mouth. “Who are you, anyway?”

“I’m Loudred! And I’m a fellow apprentice! If you’re late for our morning briefing, you’ll be SORRY! So MOVE it!”

“You seriously went to all the apprentices and woke them up with yelling?”

“Guildmaster Wigglytuff has got a BIG temper. If you make him lose it...” For a moment, he turns away from me and shudders. “YOWEEE! That would be one very scary scene! I’ve got goose bumps just thinking about it! YEESH!”

“Yeah, I kinda get to not be rude to your hosts, but...loud wake-up calls?”

“So ANYWAY...I’m not about to get in trouble because you rookies got up LATE! SO GET IT IN GEAR!” With that parting remark, he turns around and leaves down the corridor, presumably headed to the main hall.

“How very...considerate of you...” I mumble rhetorically, still not fully awake.



I begin to slowly meander out of the room, dragging one foot after the other, when after about two drags I stop short.

“Wait. Rayne,” I think aloud. “Rayne? You up?” I turn around and she’s fast asleep. I’m incredulous. Either she’s pretending to be asleep or she sleeps really deeply, because how on earth was she completely unfazed by Loudred’s yelling? I walk over to her and try to shake her awake, calling her name every few seconds to try and arouse her from sleep. None of it works – she’s out like a light and is probably going to stay that way.

“Well, nothing to it,” I say to myself, deciding what I’m going to do before I go down that hallway to meet the others.



When I finally get there, eight other apprentices are standing at attention in rows, facing the door of the Guildmaster’s room. Chatot is standing near the door, watching them all attentively. In the front row there’s a Sunflora, a Bidoof, a Chimecho, and a Croagunk, starting from the closest to me. The back row has a Diglett, a Loudred, a Corphish, and a Dugtrio, again starting from closest to me. At least I recognize the Diglett and Loudred from yesterday. The others I just saw their faces and little else. I decide to take my place to the right of the Sunflora.

“You’re LATE, rookies!” Loudred yelled at me.

“Hush!” Chatot hissed in response. “Your voice is ridiculously loud!”

“Humph...”

“You there, the newest one. You said your name was DNA, right?”

“Yes, that’s right.”

“I don’t believe I got your partner’s name yesterday. I would ask her myself, but she appears to be being carried over one of your shoulders, and fast asleep at that.”

“Yeah. She’ll wake up eventually.”

“Loudred! Weren’t you supposed to wake them both up?”

“It’s not his fault, sir. He woke me up just fine, but getting this one to wake up early?” I point to Rayne’s peacefully slumbering face as I say this. “Good luck.”

“Isn’t that putting a strain on your shoulders at all?”

“Yeah. Wow, she is heavy.”

“Anyway, everyone seems to be present. Very well. Let us conduct our morning address.”

With a chirp, Chatot turned to the door behind him, and proclaimed to the Guildmaster that we were in full attendance. Almost immediately, Guildmaster Finch opens the door and walks out in front of the crowd, staring right at them with his soulless eyes and creepy smile. I still wasn’t used to it yesterday, but right now, it looked even creepier than usual, possibly even rivaling the poster for creepiness.

“Thank you, Guildmaster!” Chatot responds with a nod and a chirp. “Please address the crew.”

Finch responded with what sounded exactly like a snore. I was incredulous, but I should have expected this. He was staring right at us, eyes open, small smile, and snoring through his teeth. This was simultaneously the most creepy and most hilarious bout of sleepwalking I’d ever seen. I overheard some of the other apprentices whispering amongst themselves and chuckling about it as well. I tried very hard to keep a straight face, but I had to disguise my chuckling as light coughing. Chatot caught on, but I pretended he didn’t. “I shouldn’t be surprised at this, but I am,” I mumble.

“Thank you, sir!” Chatot responded, slightly winded due to the unexpected ‘speech’ of the Guildmaster. “We all value your...words of wisdom! OK, Pokémon! Take our Guildmaster’s words of wisdom to heart!”

“Zzzz, zzzz, snorfle, zzzz, got it,” I reply, snarkily. This elicits some small laughter from the group. Chatot gives me a small glare before continuing, while I wink at him. He ignores it.

“Finally, let’s not forget our morning cheers! All together now!”

Ah, right, so that’s what he meant by having to say the first three lines on the poster. Fortunately I’d read the lines over a few times, so I was prepared. They weren’t hard to memorize either, so it was a relief. After a brief tempo beat of ‘a one, a two’, the entire crowd, including myself, minus the sleeping Rayne and Finch, called out the first three rules in perfect unison.

“One! Don’t shirk work! Two! Run away and pay! Three! Smiles go for miles!”

“OK, Pokémon!” Chatot chirped after. “Time to get to work!”

With a cry of “Hooray!”, the group scattered to do their usual duties. I’ll admit, that was actually a little fun to call those out. It gave me a bit of an adrenaline boost, shaking off any remaining tiredness I might have had. I was ready to do something! ...though I had absolutely no idea what I should be doing. After all, it’s my first day.



“Ah, DNA, come here please,” Chatot asked me, thus breaking my train of thought. Maybe he’d have something for me to do. I walked over, still staggering under the weight of the sleeping Vulpix on my back. He beckoned me to follow him, and hopped up the stairs at the center of the room. I made to follow him, but I fell flat on my face after a few more steps. My back finally couldn’t take the weight anymore, nor could my legs, and they both decided to give up on me. This left me with a face full of dirt and trapped under a piece of sleeping cargo.

“Yawn...what happened?”

Okay, no longer sleeping.

“You woke up. Late. Loudred woke us both up early and you slept right through that, while I had to massage my ears to get rid of the ringing. There was a morning meeting and you slept right through that, though since the Guildmaster was sleepwalking I think you got out of trouble. And I’ve been carrying you around everywhere so we don’t get punished for absence, and now my back has finally decided you’re too heavy.”

“Is that why your voice is muffled and coming from directly below me?”

“Yes. Now please get off of my back.” She did so, and I got to my feet, brushing the dust off. “Chatot is waiting for us upstairs at the notice boards; let’s go. You climb first; I’ll follow in case you fall.”



“Ah, Rayne, was it? Finally decided to come back to the land of the awake, I see?”

“Yessir, mister Chatot, sir!” Rayne replied enthusiastically, even giving a salute.

“I do hope you will make this a habit, especially given what a strain you put on your friend’s back this morning.”

“Wait, you mean he really was carrying me around while I was sleeping?”

“If you don’t mind,” I interjected, my face to the ceiling, “I’m going to lie on my back while you explain what you have in store for us, Chatot. Don’t worry, I’m awake and listening.”

“How do I know that?”

“How about tomorrow, you carry her around on your back for ten minutes and we see how you feel?”

“Um...ahem...anyway! How about we start you off with this assignment?”

“I’ll count that as a win for me.”

The three of us are standing (or in my case lying down) by the bulletin board on the left side of the first lower level. All sorts of papers are affixed to it, and it seems to be made of some kind of cork; the papers are held in place with small tacks. Some requests are more generic, others are much more detailed. Chatot reaches for one that’s a bit more detailed, and pulls it off the board.

“You’re aware that bad Pokémon are cropping up in greater numbers?” Chatot asked.

“Well, we did run into some on the beach yesterday,” Rayne commented. “But DNA beat them up good.”

“The reason for this is that the flow of time is being distorted and wreaking havoc. As a result, more bad Pokémon are appearing!”

“That doesn’t make any sense,” I said, still lying down. “Unless these bad Pokémon are all from alternate universes or whatever, a simple hand-wave as time being ‘messed up’ doesn’t explain anything. That said, I am interested, so when you find out the actual reason, let us know.”

“Well, there has also been a mass outbreak of mystery dungeons...”

“There you go. Distortion of time means distortion of space, which in turn creates an outbreak of mystery dungeons. Since these places have no solid frame of reference, this causes an increase in hostility and occasionally insanity, thus, rather than more bad Pokémon appearing, existing ones are just becoming more ‘bad’, though whether they’re just full-on evil or just mildly irritated...well, that depends from Pokémon to Pokémon. There, that’s a perfectly rational explanation. Why didn’t you just bring up the mystery dungeons sooner?”

“I...um...oh my. I didn’t know you were so intelligent.”



“No one ever thinks that at first glance. Now, you seem to be the authority on mystery dungeons, can you inform us a bit about them?”

It’s not like I needed to know – I already did – but a little flattery can get you places.

“Well...A mystery dungeon changes each time you go into it, including layout and items you may find lying about. If you faint while in one, you lose half the money you have on hand, some of your items, and are then expelled from it.”

“So that means they’re places to explore!” Rayne called out enthusiastically. “Come on DNA, let’s go find one! I want to go explore new places and find all sorts of new things! I want to see all sorts of sights and meet all kinds of new people! I want to go to as many different mystery dungeons as we can! If they keep changing, there’s bound to be so much to do!!”

“Well, you’re quite excited, aren’t you? I’d best not waste time. Let’s go read the job I have picked out for you.” Chatot handed the paper to Rayne to read aloud. It almost looked like some kind of handwritten letter, but there were a few small creases and drops of blood scattered throughout the paper. It was as if whoever was writing this did so upside-down, or after being beat up, or something to that effect. Very odd.

“Ooh, a job request!” Rayne exclaimed. “Whoever wrote this was probably very important, so I have to sound important too!” She cleared her throat for emphasis, unnecessarily loudly. “Okay, here goes! It says this:


“Hello! My name is Spoink! An outlaw has run off with my most prized possession. My precious pearl! That pearl is life itself...to me! I just can’t seem to settle down if that pearl isn’t in its proper place atop my head! But I’ve heard my pearl has been sighted! It’s said to be on a rocky bluff. But this bluff is reported to be extremely unsafe. I could never go somewhere so frightening! Oh, friendly readers! Would you be so kind as to go to the bluff and get my pearl? I beg your help, exploration team members! – From Spoink”


“Think about it, DNA! Team SOLO, retriever of items and fulfiller of dreams! We shall go forth to claim Spoink’s pearl, and upon our return to our client, we shall be hailed as heroes!”

“That was probably the most interesting intro to a fetch quest I’ve ever heard,” I answered, now back standing on my feet. “For a minute there, I thought you’d be bored that your first quest wouldn’t be rappelling down the side of a cliff face in a race to get to the bottom.”

“No, that’s silly! The guild is built into the side of the cliff, so we can go rappel whenever we want!”

“I believe you’re missing the point here...”

“Ah, who cares? Let’s go!!”

With that, she bounded off, taking off climbing up the ladder to the exit, still clutching the paper. I said to Chatot “I should probably go catch her before she hurts herself”, then thanked him and ran off in pursuit. I managed to catch up to her at the crossroads we’d passed on the way to the guild, and, holding the piece of paper in her pocket, she took a quick left turn and continued running. I tried to jump forward so I could catch up and somehow overtake her, but I fumbled and instead fell flat on my face directly behind her. The ‘fwump’ of my landing caused her to stop and turn around to see what made the noise. As expected, she started giggling.

“You’re so silly, DNA!”

“Is this it? Is this my life? Am I doomed to just trip up for your amusement in my mad attempts to keep you safe?”

“Of course not!” She helped me to my feet, and again I dusted myself off. “Without you, I wouldn’t have a brother to mess with right now!”

“From my perspective, that could be a bad thing.”

“Ah, whatever! We had a few laughs, right?”

“You did. It’ll still take a while for me. Ow, my back...”

I reached into the satchel I’d slung over my shoulder before leaving, and pulled out what looked like a scroll, opening it up.

“What’s that you have there?”

“I actually came prepared to this place so we know where we are. This is our Wonder Map, and according to the area it just filled in, we’re at a place called the Drenched Bluff. There are a lot of rocks, obviously, much like an enclosure, but water runs through most of the area. There’s a pool at its center, from which water runs out to the surrounding area.”

“Ah! Yeah! There’s a little map on this job request, and Spoink says he thought he saw his pearl at the center of the bluff!”

“Well then, I suppose we have our work cut out for us.” I rolled the map back up and tucked it into the satchel once more. “Let’s go explore this place.”

“Yay! Exploring!”



I feel grateful to actually have this satchel. I can actually carry things in it, instead of having to hold things in my hands constantly. I mean, we are a bona fide rescue team now and all, so I guess it makes sense, but going from nothing to something, and reaping the benefits of it, is a tremendous relief. As usual I’m in the front, making sure the area is safe, while Rayne is following behind me, as happy as can be.

“Hey, I found an apple!” Rayne said at one point, picking it up. She was about to take a big bite of it when I snatched it out of her hand and threw it into the satchel.

“No, not yet!”

“Aw, what’d you do that for?”

“Sis, are you hungry?”

“Well...not a lot...”

“One of the big rules of exploring is to conserve your resources. We don’t know the next time we’re going to pick up one of these apples, so we might as well save this for when we’re really hungry. Plus, given how small we are now, an apple could probably last us for most of the day.”

“You mean...no more three square meals?”

“...You’re a bit of a softie, you know that? In any case, let me know when you’re actually hungry. If we finish up soon, we might be able to eat at the guild when we get back. That would probably be better, so we can conserve these apples for when we need them the most.”

“Yessir, mister DNA sir! I bow to your superior wisdom as an explorer!”

“I hope that’s not a mock salute.”

“It’s some kind of salute!”

“This doesn’t instill me with much confidence. Oh, while we’re here...be on the lookout for a sizable stream of water. I managed to pick up some canteens from Chatot before we left since they forgot to put them in the box.”

“But aren’t I a Fire-type? Won’t I melt or won’t the water douse my internal organs or something?”

“That’s a myth. Virtually every living thing needs water to survive and you are no exception. I promise nothing bad will happen to you if you drink water.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, I’m sure.”

“Do you pinkie-swear that you’re sure?”

“You don’t even have pinkies!”

Wordlessly, she lifted up her front limb and stuck her little toe out.

“You’re not serious...”

“Do you pinkie-swear that I won’t be negatively affected if I drink water?”

“I...” With a sigh, I stretch out my hand and extend my pinkie, to shake her toe. “I pinkie-swear that you will not be negatively affected if I drink water. Now let’s keep going; we don’t have time to waste.”



There weren’t very many other items of note, though I did pick up a few seeds and berries on the way down. The trek was, for the most part, very smooth, though I did have to keep glancing behind me every few seconds just to make sure Rayne was still following me and not distracted by the newest shiny rock she happened to notice. I had to pull her back along no less than three times during this trek. It was funny the first two times, though the third I knew she was doing that just to bug me. It worked.

“Hey, isn’t that an Oran Berry?” Rayne said at some time, pointing ahead of me.

“Let’s see...” I dash up to where she was pointing, and sure enough, there was a blue berry there. I pick it up and examine it at all angles, and conclude “No, it’s not.”

“How can you tell?”

“Do you see this small beige sliver on the underside?” I turn it around so she can see it; it looked like someone had cut the berry open lengthwise, though the cut appeared to be perfectly natural and part of the berry itself, and nothing was leaking from it. “This is an Oren Berry. It’s a lookalike. If you eat it, it tastes very bitter and doesn’t help you at all.”

“Are those the only kinds of lookalikes?”

“No, there are tons of other kinds. You will have to be very careful, since they’re fairly common, and while you think they’re the real deal, they’re not. Some like this one are harmful; some I’ve heard can be quite beneficial! We should keep the beneficial ones and get rid of ones like these.”

I left the item on the ground and we kept walking. Thankfully it wasn’t long before we reached the bottom; I would have to train Rayne to be responsible or she might get us both killed in the process. Looking back over my shoulder was strenuous enough; I can’t imagine what would happen were it any worse. All right, tomorrow, it was time to train Rayne to be responsible, starting with waking up early.

...My plan is doomed to failure.

“I think we’re at the bottom now,” Rayne noted. “Hey, there are streams here! We can fill up the canteens!”

“We can, but let’s make sure it’s safe to drink first.” I knelt down at the water’s edge and scrutinized the stream. It appeared to be fine, as it wasn’t all that large and there weren’t any other forms of life in it – it was just running down some rocks. I sniffed it, then took some in my hand and drank it. There was nothing foul about it. “It’s safe. I’ll fill these up; you look to see if the pearl is nearby.”

“Found it!” I saw her holding a pink sphere about six inches across, high above her head.

“That’s convenient.” After filling up the canteens at the streams, enough so they would last us a few more days, and placing the pearl in the satchel, I stood next to Rayne and lightly tapped the explorer’s badge pinned to my shirt.

“Chatot, do you copy?” I began. “This is Team SOLO reporting. We have retrieved the pearl in question. Requesting permission to return to base. Over.”

“Um, what was that all about?” Rayne asked.

“You’ll see.”

Two seconds later, we were instantly back at the guild, on the lower level with the bulletin boards. Rayne’s eyes went so wide I thought they might burst from their sockets, but not quite as wide as when she saw me here for the first time. Her eyes were darting around the room in disbelief. We were at the bottom of the Drenched Bluff and now suddenly we’re back at the guild? Such a thing defied possibility, how could it be true?”

“W-W-What?” she sputtered. “H-How did we g-get back so f-f-fast?”

“With this,” I answered, gesturing to the explorer’s badge.

“The b-badge is m-magical? H-How did you know?”

“Weren’t you paying attention yesterday? This is a teleporter. It can teleport us from anywhere back to the guild, though I needed clearance to do so since we’re only rookies, but we are now back, safe and sound.”

“B-But how is that p-possible?”

“This makes a lot more sense if you’ve ever watched Star Trek.”



Suddenly from upstairs there came a crashing noise, as if someone rammed head-first into the wall. This is not something I would normally expect one to do, so I waited a few seconds to see what happened next. I did so, and a Spoink fell down the ladder to the room below, instantly getting back up again and bouncing around on its spring-like tail in a highly erratic fashion. Someone screamed “HELP!!” as if the Spoink were totally out of control – no, not ‘as if’ – it was definitely out of control, as it was smashing itself into pretty much every wall imaginable. Its jumps were erratic, its direction was random, and it was getting bruises all over. Chatot was nearby watching the whole scene, fluttering about and scared out of his wits.

I took the pearl out of my satchel, jumped heroically through the air, and lodged the pearl firmly on the top of the Spoink’s head. It instantly returned to a normal jump tempo, only bouncing slightly off the ground, and with perfect timing. It hadn’t calmed down just yet, though – the manic fear had now been replaced with manic excitement.

“OMG PEARL,” it yelled, bouncing very fast in place. “OMG OMG OMG...”



“Th-thank you!” it continued, now much calmer. “Th-thank you! That pearl must be propped on my head, you see. I missed it so much! I just couldn’t settle down without it up there! So I was just boinging and sproinging everywhere! That’s why I’m covered in dings and bumps. But thanks to you, that long nightmare is over! You have my sincere thanks!”

“You’re welcome,” I reply. “Do try to keep it on your head; I don’t know how many heart attacks Chatot can take before he finally keels over. I think he’s seen enough newbies come and go that he doesn’t need to worry about another one!”

I’d like to believe that Chatot heaved a sigh of relief, though if he did it was quiet enough that I didn’t really notice it. Eh, it’s my story, so I’ll say he did. Embellishing details is part of a writer’s job, after all! Oh dear, I think Rayne’s rubbing off on me.

The Spoink then hopped up to me and handed me a few items, presumably as thanks for rescuing his pearl. They looked like a few hard-to-find vitamins, plus 2000 coins’ worth of money. I was surprised that the Spoink was probably loaded (finding Protein and its kin is not an easy task), while Rayne was surprised that our reward was as big as it was.

“Wow, really? All this just for a little pearl!?” Rayne exclaimed.

“Are you complaining?” I asked, rhetorically. She shook her head ‘no’.

“Of course, of course!” the Spoink responded. “That’s nothing compared to my pearl’s value! And with that, I must go! Farewell!” It then hops over to the ladder, and with one especially strong spring, it lifts itself right out and towards the exit. There’s a brief silence hanging in the air as we watch the Spoink leave, and wait for the euphoria to set in.

“We’re rich, DNA!” Rayne jumped. “All of a sudden, we’re rich!”

“I wouldn’t call us rich, though 2000 coins is a respectable amount. Enough to buy 40 apples! Wait, what would we even do with 40 apples?”

“We’d never go hungry!”

“Apples go bad, you know.”

“...We’d never go hungry for as long as the apples didn’t go bad!”

“Well done, team!” Chatot chirped, hopping on over after the Spoink had left. “Now hand that money over, if you please!”

“What? No! I want my 40 apples!”

“Rayne, calm down. ...May I ask why, sir?”

“Well, you are apprentices here, after all. And taking care of apprentices isn’t free, you know?”

“Ah, I see, I see.” I hand him the coins without complaint. He counts them out for a bit, and sets aside a large portion of the coins for himself. After he’s done with that, he hands the rest of it back to me. I count that out, and it only amounts to 200 coins, a mere tenth of the reward.

“Wait, we only keep 200 coins? That’s not fair!” Rayne protested. “I thought rescue teams got to keep their earnings!”

“It’s called ‘room and board’, Rayne. We live under their roof, we play by their rules.”



“Hmph...” She crossed her arms and planted herself on the floor, and started mumbling. “Stupid Chatot, only lets me buy 4 apples...”

“She’ll be all right,” I whisper to Chatot. “She’ll get over it once she realizes that coins can be used to buy things that are better than apples.”

“There are things better than apples!?” Rayne sprung to her feet and ran up right next to me. Apparently I wasn’t whispering softly enough. “Like what?”

I was about to respond, but I was interrupted by the chiming of a bell. It was light and rhythmic, and incredibly soothing, as if listening to it for too long would put others to sleep. It seemed to come from the mess hall downstairs. Curious, I hopped down the ladder to look for the source. A Chimecho had just emerged from the mess hall as I got down there, which I assume was the one who rang the bell.

“Everyone! Thanks for waiting!” she called out with a song-like voice, or rather bell-like, pun slightly intended. “I finished making dinner! Come on! Dinner’s on!”

“And that, Rayne,” I answered her, “is better than apples.”

No sooner had those words escaped my mouth that the entire guild came clambering down towards the mess hall. From upstairs, from the apprentice’s quarters, even from underground – pretty much everyone in the guild came out and rushed towards the mess hall at full speed. I had to pull myself and Rayne out of the way to hug the wall, just so we wouldn’t get run over.

“Wow, is the dinner really that good here?” she asked.

“If you cook it, they will come.”

It really was as good as the stampeding crowd made it out to be. A lot of the food on my plate I’d never even seen before, but a lot of it looked like various fruits – small, large, round, flat, and everything in between. There was also some meat on the plates that I knew better to ask what it was from – after all, food is food. Everyone else devoured it with gusto, but I, being cautious when I try new things, started sampling things on the plate one by one. To put it lightly, it was like drowning my mouth in the pure essence of flavor. It was delicious. I asked Rayne what she thought of it, but her face was buried in the plate. It was like watching a vacuum with eyes.

When everyone was done, a lot of compliments were passed around the table regarding the quality of the cooking – and indeed, it was as good as purported to be. However, it was followed up by several of the apprentices saying that, now that they were full, they were very sleepy. I’ll admit I felt tired as well, so after giving my compliments to the chef, Rayne and I both retired to our chambers, now that the moon was in the sky. Before we slept, though, we took a moment to reflect on all that had happened today.

“So, how was the first day, sis?”

“It was actually pretty cool! We got our first official job and got to explore a whole new place! That bluff was very beautiful, honestly, and picking up the pearl was the icing on the cake. I didn’t know that badge could teleport, either! Though, if I’d been paying more attention to Finch yesterday, I might have noticed...”

“Yeah, the teleporter was the very first thing I noticed. I think you were just distracted.”

“It was a bit of a letdown that we only got 200 coins instead of the full 2000, but I guess that’s the cost of being trained as a rescue team. Still, I would have really liked it!”

“What exactly were you planning on doing with 2000 coins?”

“Buy 40 apples, duh!”

“Did you have any other ideas?”

“No, silly. You’re the smart one; good ideas are your job!”

“Heh. I choose to take that as a compliment.”

“What do you think will be in store for us tomorrow?”

“Probably more of the same, I’d guess. Plus, only retaining ten percent gives us more incentive to go out and take on more jobs. But there is a silver lining – only coin earnings from jobs get deducted. Everything else is ours to keep, no strings attached. This includes all the items and coins we find lying around in dungeons – or even item rewards from jobs.”

“Huh, you’re right, I didn’t notice that! I guess it is better than I thought.”

“Indeed it is. Now, you need to go to sleep now; I don’t need another compulsory workout dragging you asleep everywhere. I plan to go to sleep after I record what we did today in the journal.”

“What do you plan to do if I don’t wake up in the morning? I mean, this is me we’re talking about here. Getting me to wake up early is like pulling teeth.”

“I’ll think of something, don’t you worry. Now go to sleep. The earlier you rest, the earlier you’ll wake up.”

Rayne went to sleep right away as asked, while I spent the next few minutes hurriedly jotting down today’s progress in our Team SOLO journal, which is what you see here. I know Rayne isn’t going to wake up early tomorrow either – how she manages to be completely oblivious to Loudred’s yelling is beyond me – but I will say that my plan involves drops of water.

But of course.


NEVER
#meta

Truth be told, I had to think of something that would make an Oren Berry a lookalike. They have the same sprite, but there has to be some difference, otherwise I wouldn't be able to tell. The beige cut-shaped sliver was the first thing that came to mind, and so it went.
In-game, it tells you what each item is as you pick it up, with 100% accuracy. I have to find a way to legitimize that, so I can actually tell the difference. It's going to be different for each item (for example, the Geo Pebble's lookalike, the Gone Pebble, will probably have a tear-shaped indentation on one side, and the No-Stick Cap's lookalike, the No-Slip Cap, will probably have a very minor difference, like having something backwards).

The hardest one to legitimize is going to be the Reviser Seed, if it ever comes up. I am probably going to give that line to Rayne.
"Oh, silly me, that was an S, not a V! *falls over*"

I try to coincide my postings of new chapters with whenever Rayne is around so she's the first one to read them. This didn't happen with Chapter 3 (last one) or 4 (this one) because she keeps running off to do something.

I'll post this new chapter down now, so I'm not behind schedule, but in the meantime, I need to give Rayne a frowny face.

~~~

[Back to Top]



A few small rays of the sun began to peek through the round window in the room. They gracefully danced over my eyes, as if inviting me to enjoy the day ahead. I noticed their warmth come over me, and blinked my eyes a few times, though they didn’t open very far – only about a third of the way at most. It was a wonderful feeling – I was about to enjoy the radiant heat of the sunrise from within the confines of my room, and with a smile I would savor these moments.

This feeling lasted for about three seconds.

“UP AND AT ‘EM! IT’S MORNING!”

“Dangit Loudred, I told you to tone it down!” My ears were ringing again and the moment gone.

“I did! I’m going EASY on you guys!”

“Toning it down by one decibel isn’t enough to be noticeable!” I rolled onto my feet, steadily opening my eyes with a series of blinks. “Is Rayne still fast asleep?”

“Looks like it.”

“Don’t run off yet.”

“Why not? I TOLD you, we don’t want to be LATE!”

“We won’t be. Besides, you’ll want to stick around for this.”

It didn’t take me too long to regain my balance and composure – probably only five seconds at most. This was good, because I would need the utmost care for what I was about to do.

“Stay perfectly quiet,” I asked. “I know it’s difficult, but trust me on this.”

I walked slowly over to our satchel – I would have walked faster, but I just woke up, give me a break – and pulled out the canteen I had designated for Rayne. I knelt down next to Rayne, who was sleeping on her side, unscrewed the lid, and positioned it so that the top was only open a tiny bit. I then proceeded to hold it directly over her ear.

“You’re not...” Loudred began, but I held a finger to my mouth for silence, a mischievous grin creeping onto my face, which I made no attempt to hide. The canteen was open only just enough to let one drop of water out at a time, and those drops fell one at a time into Rayne’s ear. Drip... Drip... Drip... All I needed to do was wait.

After the fifth drop, I got the reaction I wanted. She jumped to her feet instantly, causing me to instinctively step back and seal the canteen up again. She shook herself about, shuddering, then leaned her head to one side to let the water drain out.

“Uuuuuuuuuugh, that was horrible!” she shouted. “I didn’t think we were sleeping outside! There’s water in my ear, it feels disgusting...”

“Glad you could join us,” I interjected. She looked around and noticed me with the canteen in my hand, plus Loudred at the entrance to our room, trying very hard to not burst out laughing.

“Wait, that was YOU!? Why would you DO that!?”

“You know how you said yesterday that it’d be hard to get you to wake up early, sis? I took that as a personal challenge.”

At this point, Loudred was unable to control himself any longer and started laughing, rolling about on the floor as he did so. I honestly couldn’t blame him; what he stuck around for was more than worth the price of admission.



“AHAHAHAHA! That was amazing!” Loudred bellowed. “I can’t believe you pulled that off!”

“Told you you’d want to stick around. Now let’s go, we mustn’t be late.”

There was a protest of Rayne going “B-B-But...”, though it was incomplete, so she just decided to follow along to not get in trouble. I’d probably get an earful myself later, pun intended, but it was definitely worth it for what I wanted to accomplish, so I will gladly accept whatever punishment I will receive as consequence.



“And...three! Smiles go for miles!”

“OK, Pokémon! ♪ Time to get to work! ♪”

“Hooray!!”

After the morning briefing broke up, I looked back at Rayne. Her expression was a curious mix of sleepiness, confusion, irritation, and laughter. I honestly couldn’t tell what she was about to do, but no doubt the water-in-the-ear prank was still fresh in her mind.

“Yes?” I begin the conversation.

“Did you seriously pour water in my ear just to wake me up early?”

“Well, Loudred’s yelling didn’t work, so I had to get inventive. I simply used what I had on hand, and it worked, much better than I was expecting.”

“Are...Are you going to do that to me every morning?”

“If Loudred’s yell isn’t enough to wake you up, then yes. Because it works. ...You got to poke fun at me for so many other reasons before and probably since as well; this is the one chance I’ll get to have something on you. And besides, it’s not like it’s a bad thing. I’m not a jerk.”

“Heh, I guess that’s true. So, what are we going to do today?”

“Good question. Hey Chatot, what’s on the agenda for today?”

“Oh! Um...Yes of course. Come with me, please!”

As with yesterday, he hops up the stairs to the floor above, back to the bulletin boards from which we take jobs. Unlike yesterday, however, he took us to the other board, on the right side of the room (as opposed to the left).

“Oh? Last time we did a job, it was from the board on the other side...” Rayne inquired.

“Correct!” came the chirpy reply. “Today, we’ll have you do a job listed on this side.”

“How is this different from the board on the other side?”

“Take a closer look!”

The requests here had pictures of Pokémon’s faces on them, taking up most of the room. The requests themselves appeared to be written below the pictures. I don’t think there was a single request on here that didn’t have a picture on it – as opposed to the other side, which barely had any pictures at all. The pictures here also appeared to have a somewhat dark air to them, though maybe it was just my imagination...or the lighting.

“Oh! Look at this, DNA!” Rayne gestured. “There are posters up here that show a variety of Pokémon! Wow, they all look sort of cool! Are they famous explorers? Who are these Pokémon, Chatot?”

“The Pokémon posted here...are outlaws,” Chatot answered.

“That’s a kind of explorer!” Her smile went from enthusiastic to silly at this point.

“How in th—” I was about to ask, but Rayne cut me off as she continued her explanation.

“Outlaws are explorers that live on the dangerous side! They explore how to get into vaults full of money, or wallets full of credit cards!”

“Credit...cards?” Chatot asked, utterly confused. Of course he didn’t know what a credit card was; it was an entirely human invention.

“Don’t encourage her,” I told him. Then to her, “Only you would compare an outlaw to an explorer.”

“Hey, you know me!”

“Yes, sadly.”

“Aw, what’s that supposed to mean?” She still was wearing the silly smile, then gave me a nudge. “You know you like that explanation!”

I chuckled a bit and rolled my eyes in mock surrender. “Yeah, I guess so.”

“Anyway!” Chatot cleared his throat to continue explaining. It sounded more like a cluck. Maybe he’s secretly a chicken? It would explain why he was scared of the Spoink. “They’re all shady characters, and they’re wanted for committing crimes. So there are bounties on their heads – in other words, there is a cash reward if you capture one.”

“Cash reward?” Rayne’s eyes lit up. “Bro! You hear that? We can buy 40 apples again!”

I facepalmed and let out an exasperated sigh. “Continue, Chatot.”

“There are so many aggressive Pokémon around these days that everyone’s finding it hard to keep up with the problem.”

“And we’re supposed to go catch these outlaws?” I ask. “There’s a big difference between a thief and a murderer, you know...”

“The bad Pokémon out there come in all shades of badness! Some of those Pokémon are completely wicked, through and through... But there are also bad Pokémon who are merely petty thieves. So you’ve got evil to naughty...and everything in between! So I’m sure we can avoid giving you a job catching a superbad Pokémon...”

I would have been relieved by this statement, if Chatot didn’t immediately append a sickening sweet laugh to the end of it. It sounded like “Hee-heeeee!” followed by a chirp.

“So look over these posters, then pick a Pokémon that looks weak enough for you to bring to justice!” he concluded.

“Did we just suddenly turn into vigilante bullies?” I ask.

“It’s all a part of your training. You’ll work through it, I’m sure!”

“And now you’re trying to desensitize us. Wonderful.”

“But I suppose you do need to be prepared to confront a tough opponent... So I’ll have someone give you a tour of the facilities. Hey, Bidoof! Bidoof?!”

From the floor below, a cry of “Yup yup!” was heard, calling up the stairs. The owner of the voice, who was unquestionably a Bidoof and looked like he was from the Pokémon equivalent of Podunk, climbed up the stairs into the room. I felt sorry for the poor fellow because he looked like a sentient bratwurst.



“You called?” he asked, dashing up to Chatot and panting, out of breath.

“Ah, Bidoof! These are the new recruits that just joined us. Take them and show them around the town.”

“Yes sirree! By golly, I’ll do just that! Yup yup!”

“This is Bidoof,” Chatot continued, now turning to us. “He’s one of your fellow apprentices. I want you to pay attention to what Bidoof has to say and follow his orders. Off you go!”

With that, he leaves, with Bidoof presumably going to carry out the inane task that Chatot has delivered to him. I can understand being given a tour of the guild, true, but I think we’d be fine in the town on our own. Besides, Rayne said she arrived here in the morning, and I in the evening, so she’d probably know the town pretty well by now anyway. I decide the first chance we get, we’re going to bail and check out the town for ourselves.

“Aw, shucks, I’m overjoyed!” Bidoof exclaimed, his eyes watery.

“Dangit, I just lost my train of thought!” I replied, my face frustrated. I quickly regained my composure. “I mean, why’s that?”

“I’m glad to have members junior to me! I’m almost overcome right now... I might just blubber with happiness?”

“Blubber, really?” Rayne asked. “Hey bro, is that even a verb?”

“Yes, apparently,” I said after a bit of thought. “It means to sob noisily.”

“Cool. I should use that word sometime in one of my stories!”

“Why, to describe a walrus crying?”

“...Close enough for me!”



“Before you all signed on, I was the most recent rookie...” Bidoof murmured, looking very close to blubbering himself. I thought he would have done so too, if he didn’t shake himself about and finish with “Well, I’d best show you around. Come with me, please.”

“Actually, I think I recall the layout of the guild,” I interjected, “but I’m not sure if I have it exactly right. Mind if I tell you so you can correct me if I’m wrong?”

“Yup yup! Wow, I’ve never been asked something like this before...it’s an honor!”

“All right, so on the floor below us, the lowest one, there’s the mess hall off to the west where everyone gathers for dinner at the end of the day. Right outside that is Croagunk with his cauldron, plus a vine that leads down to the sentry post. Then you have the stairs in the middle, then the Guildmaster’s chamber, and then the living quarters off to the east. That all correct so far?”

“Yup.”

“Then we have this floor. There’s two bulletin boards here, one on either side. The west one’s for basic jobs, like rescuing someone or retrieving an item, while the east one is for outlaw requests. This is also the main plaza area where teams meet up and talk and what-have-you. The ladder’s in the middle, and it leads down to the lowest floor and up to the outside. That’s roughly everything, right?”

“By golly! You remember all that? And you’ve only been here a few days?”

“I try to stay attentive to details. I also know there’s a town further down the road...Rayne, you’ve looked around the town, right? Back when you were looking for a place?”

“Yeah, that’s right.”

“How about you show me the sights? I’m sure you know it well enough to explain everything. It’ll be like its own little adventure!”

“Oh, cool! Sure, let’s go right away! Follow me!”

Without even waiting for a response, Rayne took off up the stairs and ran outside, with a cry of “Hurry up!” echoing behind her. I said to Bidoof that I should go and make sure she doesn’t hurt herself, while he said he’d stay here until we were ready to choose an outlaw job. I thanked him and left. Rayne was waiting for me at the crossroads, filling up her canteen at the nearby watering hole. I decided to do the same, since I now had a chance to do so, instead of hoping to find a water source while out and about. She runs too fast for my own good.

“I see you decided to wait this time,” I said. “You realized I was trying to bail on him?”

“You were trying to bail on him? That’s mean...”

“I was doing it to spend more time with you.”

That remark earned me a “Oh, stop it, you” and a jab to the arm. Totally worth it.

“Would you be willing to show me around the town, Rayne? You are the expert in this field, after all.”

“Of course! Now follow behind me, my student, as the expert tells you all about the wonderful place known as Treasure Town!”

“I don’t believe being the expert gives you the right to be pompous.”

“Ahem, who’s the expert here?”

“You are...”

“Exactly! And as the expert, I say you must follow behind me if you wish to learn!”

Let her have the moment, DNA. You can salvage what’s left of your dignity later.

I walked into Treasure Town right behind Rayne, who had currently adjusted her gait to be much like a march. I could even hear her whispering ‘one, two, one, two’ as she walked, her footsteps rigid and orderly. Of course this was an act – Rayne couldn’t be genuinely serious if her life depended on it – but she was very good at looking important. Again, let her have the moment.

“This is the main square for the local Pokémon. It’s called Treasure Town!” she explained, trying to have her voice carry as much as possible, despite only having a captive audience of one – emphasis on ‘captive’. “It’s divided into east and west halves! In the eastern half, there are four facilities, but only one is open right now – the Duskull Bank! That’s where we can store our money, and though our savings there do not accumulate interest, there are no fees for deposits or withdrawal! In essence, it is just like a money vault!”

“I can hear you; you don’t need to speak up and puff your chest out.”

“Expert speaking!”

“...oh dear.”



“There’s also the Electivire Link Shop, the Chansey Day Care, and the Marowak Dojo! Those are all very important sounding names, but they’re closed so I don’t know what they’re for! Now, onto the western half of town! Onward, student!”

As before, she started her march-like walk to the western side of town, still whispering ‘one, two’ with each set of steps. I followed close behind, hoping no one was watching, or at least hoping no one would laugh. It’s my story, so I say that no one laughed. It’s much easier on me that way.

“The western side of town only has three points of interest!” Rayne continued after we got there, once again having her voice carry. “This means that it is slightly less important than the eastern side, but that is of no consequence!”

“They can hear you, you know,” I noted. “Besides, the eastern side only has one place open. This has two. That means it already has a better track record.”

“Details, details!” She waved her hand in dismissal. “Anyway, the shop right here is the Kecleon Market! It’s run by two brothers, green and purple – the green specializes in basic travel items, while the purple one deals in the more exotic things like TMs and Wonder Orbs! And off to the southwest is Kangaskhan Storage, where we can store the items we don’t need! At first they offer a 64-item plan, but the more our rescue team rank increases, the more items we’ll be allowed to store! And best yet, it’s totally free to any rescue team! None of those silly monthly fees. Now this is service at its finest!”

“I guess how after they heard that Pokémon Square’s storage was infinite, they had to make a few cutbacks to make room for all the space.”

This truly is one thing I miss about the first set of Mystery Dungeon games. That and the Friend Areas. Those were the best. But I digress.

“And that about covers it! Did you understand everything I told you, my pupil?”

“Yes, Rayne, I did. Kangaskhan for storage, Kecleon for buying stuff, Duskull for holding money, and more stuff later when it opens up. Got it.”

“Very good! Now, before we leave off to our next great adventure, we must visit the Kecleon Market! A visit to the Kecleon market to prepare is an absolute must!”

“You just want to buy all the apples off them, don’t you.”

“Yep! Can’t fight crime on an empty stomach, after all!”

At about that moment, before we had a chance to peruse their wares, an Azurill and a Marill came in from the east side of town. They were walking together, and appeared to be brothers. They stopped in front of the Kecleon Market, and began to talk with the shopkeepers, when...

“Hey, no cutting!”

“Hush up, Rayne.”

Sorry about that. We stepped back to give the two of them room.

“Misters Kecleon!” the Marill speaks. His voice is young, but enthusiastic.

“Ah, little Marill and Azurill!” the green Kecleon responds, clearly happy to see them. “Welcome, my young friends!”

“Hello. May I buy an apple?” asked the Azurill. He sounded even younger, not much surprise.

“Oh, most certainly!”

“Thank you, Misters Kecleon!” Azurill exclaims happily, as the transaction is completed. I wasn’t quite sure of it, but I could have sworn that they bought two apples, not one.

“No, thank you, my young friends! You are to be admired!” Green replied. The three of them smile and laugh a bit, and the two brothers leave. Seeing we’re nearby, Green turns to us and explains his (and their) behavior.

“You see, those delightful children are brothers. Lately, their poor mother has fallen sick. So those youngsters come and do the shopping for her. It’s quite remarkable. Though very young, they’ve stepped up and taken charge.”

“Aha, I see,” I respond. “How remarkably touching. I do hope their mother feels better soon.”

“Apples can cure diseases too?” Rayne asks, clearly enthralled. “Wow, what is in those apples?”

“I’m not sure it works quite like that...”

“Misters Kecleon!” That was definitely Marill’s voice. Sure enough, the two of them run right back to the market.

“Oh? What’s the hurry?” Green asks. “What makes you return in such a rush?”

“There was an extra apple!” Azurill explains. So I was right, there were two apples.

“We didn’t pay for this many,” Marill states apologetically. But wait, if they didn’t pay for two, then...

“Oh, yes...” Green states. “That, young friends, is a gift from me and my brother. Please, share it among yourselves and do enjoy.” ...I thought so.

“Really?!” Marill exclaims.

“Yay!” Azurill shouts. It was more like a yell, he was so overjoyed. Just looking at the two of them, I thought they might burst from sheer excitement. “Thank you, Mr Kecleon and Mr Kecleon!”

“Oh, not to worry, my friends. Do take care on your way home.”

The two of them then thank the Kecleon profusely again, and turn to leave. Marill walks a bit faster than his brother, so Azurill hurries to catch up, but in so doing, he trips and falls, causing one of the apples he was holding to fly backward over his head, landing in front of my feet. Instinctively, I pick the apple up and walk over to hand it to him.

“W-We’re sorry to bother you,” Azurill says to me. “Thank you so much.”

“Don’t apologize; you’re fine,” I respond. “Now go catch up to your brother.”

He’s about to do so, but right then, I clutch my head with my other hand. My eyes squint shut, and I fall to one knee. My vision starts to blur, and my head is pounding!

“DNA!” Rayne yells, dashing over to me. “What’s wrong!?”

“Dizzy...” I mutter, the sensation overcoming me as I find it hard to speak. “Everything fuzzy...”

“I’ve got you!” She holds my head so it stops shaking. It only seems to help a tiny bit, as soon thereafter, my eyes shut completely, but instead of seeing nothing but black, my vision is flooded with a flash of white. It seemed to start as a spark, but it flooded my senses, even with my eyes closed. I then heard a scream of “H-H-H...HELP!” before the white faded away to black, and the dizziness dissipated.

“Huh...what...” I mumble, blinking my eyes several times. “What was...”

“Are you okay, DNA?” Rayne asked.

“I think so.” I take a swig of my canteen just in case, since I’ve known dehydration to cause dizziness. “Did you hear anyone scream?”

“No, I didn’t.” She turned to the Kecleon brothers. “Did you guys hear a scream?”

“No, nothing out of the ordinary,” Green replied.

“I didn’t hear anything odd either,” answered Purple.

“Then...” I looked in front of me, and Azurill was still standing right there. “Why would...”

“Is something the matter?” Azurill asks me, a confused look on his face. It isn’t every day that people get dizzy spells, so he was probably concerned for me. I’m still rubbing my head, but I feel fine at the moment.

“Hey, Azurill? What’s going on?” Marill calls out before I have a chance to answer. “Hurry home!”

“Yup, I’m coming! Wait up!” Azurill manages to catch up to his brother.

“Are you all right?”

“Yup!”

“We’re done with our shopping. Now we gotta look for an item we’ve lost! Let’s get going.”

“Yup! I’m coming!” And with that, the two of them leave to do their business.

“DNA, you gonna be okay?” Rayne asked me. “You shouldn’t push yourself. If this happens again you should probably rest for a bit. I can’t have you collapsing.”

“I know, I know. I can take care of myself. But I could swear, right then...The scream I heard was Azurill crying for help. Was I imagining it? He looked just fine to me...”

“Maybe you did imagine it, but either way you need to take it easy on yourself.”

“I suppose so. Bidoof’s probably waiting for us; he said he’d be ready to help us pick out a job. Should we go back to check up on him?”

“Sure, let’s go. I’m anxious to catch a bad guy! Halt, bad guys! I’m Sheriff Rayne!”

“And what does that make me?”

“Deputy DNA, obviously! And together, we are Team SOLO!”

“I’m pretty sure I’m the team leader...”

“Just let me have this moment.”

“All right, all right. Now let’s get moving.”

The two of us then prepare to walk back to the guild. I’m walking a bit slower than normal just in case I fall dizzy again, and Rayne is walking at my side in case of the same. I really don’t want to get another headache like that, especially not while out in the field, so I try to take it easy on myself just in case it might appear again.

While I’m walking, I open and close my mouth a few times, listening for the ‘clack’ noise that I hear whenever my jaws touch each other. I’m almost used to this thing! It’s still weird I have to use my teeth as a weapon. Later I’ll practice using my hands.

We’re about to reach the crossroads, when I see Azurill and Marill up ahead, talking with someone who looks like a fat baby elephant—no wait, that’s a Drowzee; my mistake. I hear cries of “Yaaaay!” and “Thank you!” with a response of “Please! It’s nothing” as we’re walking up. Rayne is naturally curious, and asks what’s going on. Azurill recognizes us and says hi.

“Some time ago, we lost an item that’s pretty important to us,” Marill exclaims, somewhat distraught. “We’ve been looking all over, but we haven’t found it yet! Then Mister Drowzee came along... and says he may have seen our lost item somewhere! He even offered to help us look for it. We’re so happy about this!”

“Ah, is that right?” Rayne responds. “That’s good to hear!”

“Hey, Rayne,” I whisper. “These two little guys are being offered help by a complete stranger to look for something they’ve lost. On a scale of 1 to Smeargle, how sketchy would you say this is?”

“It is kinda weird, yeah... He does seem nice enough, at least.”

“Doesn’t make it any less Smeargle.”

“Thank you, Mister Drowzee!” Azurill exclaimed, jumping for joy.

“Oh, please...” Drowzee replies, sounding somewhat bashful. “I’d have to have a cold heart to ignore kids in need! I can’t turn a blind eye! Let us be on our way to begin our search!”

“Totally Smeargle,” I whisper to Rayne.

They’re all about to go off to search for the lost item in question, whatever it may be. Azurill and Marill go on ahead, followed by Drowzee, who accidentally brushes me as he passes.

“Whoops!” Drowzee states, apologetic. “Excuse me.”

“It’s fine,” I respond.

The Drowzee then leaves. Much to my surprise, I fall to one knee again, clutch my head, and squint my eyes. My head’s pounding, everything feels like it’s moving...

“Dizzy again...” I mumble. “Argh, it hurts...”

“Don’t worry!” Rayne said, holding my head still again. “Just drink some more water and rest! We’ll just tell Bidoof you’re not feeling well today!”

As my eyes finally squint shut, I being unable to hold them open any longer, a flash of white then floods my blackened vision again, just as before. To my surprise, a vision fades into view, despite my eyes being closed. It looks like a large rocky area, possibly part of a mountain or plateau. A Drowzee and Azurill are facing each other, and I hear the following conversation take place, with Drowzee speaking first:

“If you keep being difficult, it will mean big trouble for you!”

“H-H-H-...HELP!”

The vision then fades away to the flash of white, which promptly disappears as it’s swallowed up by the blackness of closed eyes. The shock of what I’ve just seen registers instantly.

“Drowzee is a pedophile!” I exclaim as I leap to my feet, eyes wide open, dizziness gone, and feeling completely alert.



“What!?” Rayne looks about as surprised as I am.

“I saw a vision of Drowzee and Azurill in some rocky area, and Azurill was screaming for help! It was the same scream I heard before! I’m positive!”

“You serious?”

“I wouldn’t joke about this! Let’s go!” I take off running, and Rayne follows.

“But...what about Bidoof?”

“Argh...” I stop short. “We’re going to have to tell him we have to find that guy...”

“Well, let’s hurry! The faster we talk to Bidoof, the faster we can go leave!”

*Argo has joined the party -DNA Fans-! Your resource income has increased!*

I absolutely love this. Its a shame I didn't know you were a good writer, I would've followed your other stuff! Maybe ill go back and read it soon, but for now, ill wait patiently for more of Project Solo!

"Good writer" is all relative but I'd like to believe I have at least some form of writing ability. I wouldn't call myself good by any means, though; my skill deteriorated since it hasn't been used in a few years. I picked this up again as a sort of personal challenge to myself.

I'm glad to see you enjoy it, though! The chapters will come steadily (twice a week is my goal), so pop in often. Ah, and it's "SOLO", all caps - since it's an acronym.

<DNA> On a scale of 1 to Smeargle, how sketchy is it?
<HauntedWater> Pamela Anderson

...hahahahaha

This chapter is dedicated to The Black Glove, because of the way he always enters a room.

~~~

[Back to Top]



At the crossroads, instead of heading out of town, we turn left to head towards the guild, to go find Bidoof who is no doubt waiting for us. “I’ve prepared our satchel already, so we can leave at a moment’s notice.” We both clamber down the ladder very quickly and return to Bidoof, who was occupying himself by playing tic-tac-toe by himself. Somehow, he was losing. I don’t even know how it’s possible to lose tic-tac-toe against yourself. I’ll ask Rayne later. Maybe she knows.

“Bidoof!” I exclaim out of breath. “We found out something, so we’re going to—”

I was cut off by the sound of a siren and the quaking of the ground. A voice then cried out “Stand clear! Updating listings! Stand clear! Updating listings!”

“An earthquake? What’s going on?” I yell, my voice still raised from the urgency of the matter.

“Oh, the data’s being updated,” Bidoof responded, as calm as calm could be.

“Data...being updated?”

The rumbling then promptly stopped, and as it did so, both of the boards in the main lobby flipped around, so that their backs, which had nothing posted on them, were now visible.

“The bulletin boards, they’re...” I begin.

“The Outlaw Notice Board and Job Bulletin Board are set up on revolving panels,” Bidoof explains. “While the panel is flipped over... A Pokémon named Dugtrio swaps out the old jobs with new ones.”

“Hm? So Dugtrio’s the one who updates the boards each day?”

“Updating data is Dugtrio’s duty. He tunnels his way to our guild... then he flips the panel and updates the data. This duty doesn’t get noticed much, but it’s very important. Yup yup! That’s why Dugtrio takes such great pride in the duty he does!”

“If I see Dugtrio one day, I will most certainly have to thank him.” I was trying not to fidget. I wanted an excuse to bail out of this conversation so very badly, though not to avoid Bidoof this time. This time, I actually had a legitimate excuse, and I didn’t want those two brothers to fall afoul of something horrible.

“Update completed! Stand clear! Update completed! Stand clear!” It was the same voice that spoke out during the quaking. Most likely, it was Dugtrio’s voice.

“Oh, looks like he’s done,” Bidoof said. He was promptly answered by the board flipping back over, with an entirely new set of bulletins attached. Some of them looked a bit older, like they’d been there a while, but there were clearly some new ones. “Yes sirree! The data is updated. The list of outlaws has been refreshed, so let’s pick one.”

“DNA, aren’t you going to tell Bidoof?” Rayne asks me. “We do need an excuse to...DNA?”

I didn’t answer. My eyes were affixed to the board – specifically at a bulletin in the top left. My fists and teeth clenched, my eyelids narrowed, and my irises, normally red, began to be filled with a flame of adrenaline mixed with anger. And, on top of all that, I was visibly shaking. There, in the top left, was a bulletin with a Drowzee’s face on it. My suspicions were confirmed – the Drowzee we’d seen earlier was a wanted criminal.

“Huh? What’s ailing you?” Bidoof asked me, appearing concerned. “Why are you shivering all of a sudden? It’s not cold here, after all.”

“Excuse found!” I yell, tearing the bulletin off the board and shoving it into a pocket. “Rayne, let’s go chase him down now! Bidoof, I’ll explain later – for now, we have to move!”

We weren’t even going to wait for a response – we took off out of the guild as fast as our legs could carry us, which for creatures so small was surprisingly fast. Right as I left, I heard Bidoof say “Now what’s going on? Where are you all off to?” but I didn’t have time to stick around for a response – not when I knew that a criminal was nearby! I had to find those three quick!

“Oh! Marill’s over there!” Rayne called out as soon as we get to the crossorads. “Marill, what’s the matter? Where are Azurill and Drowzee?”

“Yes...about them...!” Marill responded, sweating, and visibly both worried and scared. “After we all left, we went looking for our lost item together... But I wound up all alone when Mister Drowzee went somewhere with Azurill. I called and called! But they didn’t come back. I got scared...”

“Do you know which way they went?”

“Th-That way!”

“Lead the way! Let’s go!”

The three of us take off into a run, with Marill up ahead and Rayne and I directly behind. He was headed toward a mountainous area, and while it didn’t take that long to get there, to me it felt like time was slowing down, like every moment was precious. I couldn’t wait to get there, to give Drowzee a kick in the teeth or something. The thought of him already sickened me!

“So, you think Azurill and Drowzee went off in this direction?” Rayne asked Marill, noting the rocky path up ahead that led up a mountain.

“Yes...”

“Oh, DNA! The Drowzee and Azurill you saw in your dream... You said you saw them in a mountainous place, didn’t you?”

“Yeah, I did. More likely than not, they are probably further up the mountain.”

“Then let’s get going, DNA!” Rayne looked oddly serious...like, actually serious this time – it wasn’t an act. That was surprising in and of itself, but I was too focused on rescuing Azurill that my face didn’t register any surprise. “Azurill and Marill are counting on us!”

“Right!”



The first thing I do is consult our Wonder Map to find out exactly where we are, and what to expect. Sure enough, the map has filled itself in to mark this mountain, which it identifies as Mount Bristle. The path is expansive and mazelike, and seems to be partially within the mountain itself. I sense there’s going to be a very long climb ahead of us. Nothing to it but to begin our climb.

“Hm, what’s this?” I see something on the ground that’s unfamiliar, so I pick it up and look it over. “It looks like a white jellybean.”

“A jellybean? Dibs!”

“No, Rayne. I think this is a Gummi.”

“A gummy? Like one of those chewable vitamin things? Those taste so good!”

“Something like that, except I believe they all have different flavors, much like jellybeans.”

“Jellybeans? Dibs!”

“Now cut that out. Anyway, we’d best hold on to this for now. You’d probably like the red ones best. As for myself, I suspect orange will be my favorite flavor...”

“Silly DNA, orange is a color, not a flavor!”

“In any case, we should hang on to as many Gummis as we can. I have a feeling we’ll like them later, as a snack. But for now we’re on the move, so we don’t have much time to rest.”

“DNA, look out behind you!”

“What!?” I instinctively turn around and bite whoever was behind me, which turned out to be a Geodude. It seemed to work, but it did hurt my teeth. Rocks aren’t easy to eat.

“Ow. ...I’m okay; that just surprised me, that’s all. Let’s keep going.”

Rayne and I begin to quicken our pace, as we’re in a race against time here and need to catch up to Drowzee before something untoward happens. The climb appears to be very smooth for the most part, especially through the middle of the mountain, but when we’re further up the climb (the map said we were on the seventh floor, though it felt like the altitude was 1400 feet), I end up running into a trap set by a rogue Nidorina and get poisoned. Rayne picks up the slack and finishes the hostile off for me, but I’m definitely not feeling well, like I’m about to collapse.

“Argh! That accursed...”

“DNA, you can’t push yourself!”

“I know! But we haven’t found any Pecha berries and I feel my energy slowly being drained away. We need to find a small clearing; I don’t feel confident resting here where we can be attacked.”

“What about that seed you picked up earlier? The glowing one?”

“The Reviver Seed, you mean? I want to hold on to this for when we actually need it. Stuff like this is really hard to find, and if I can drag it out for as long as I can, then I will.” I pull out an Oran berry I’d found earlier and chow down on that instead. I feel much better, though the poison’s still in my system. “That should be enough for me to get to a clearing. Let’s go...”

Thankfully there weren’t any other assaults or traps on the way to the next clearing, which wasn’t too far off. I take the opportunity to relax and let the poison wear off – by the time I got there, its potency had vastly diminished anyway – and when I was feeling all better, we kept going. We were near the top so I wasn’t too worried, though on the way there, a Spinarak snuck up on Rayne, and she got so surprised at it she turned around and sneezed. At that very moment I found out her sneezes were highly flammable. So did the Spinarak.

The Spinarak was much worse off.

“Take that!” Rayne proclaimed, giggling. “I am Rayne, the Fire Sneezer!”

“This shouldn’t surprise you at all. Now just learn how to breathe fire without having to sneeze and we’ll be fine. And...hey, are we at the top already?”

“Looks like it! I think I hear something!”

“Shh, keep your voice down and watch. We’ll sneak up very quietly... When I give the signal, we charge. Got it?”

Rayne nodded as the two of us watched what was going on up ahead. Sure enough, Azurill and Drowzee were there, in a rocky plateau-like area that looked just like the one in my vision. Azurill was in front, while Drowzee was a short distance behind. If I had to guess, Drowzee was leading Azurill here. It had to be. This place was a dead end.

“Excuse me, Mister Drowzee,” Azurill asked. “Where is my lost item? Could you show me where the item is now?”

“Sorry, kiddo,” came Drowzee’s response. “Your lost item? It’s not here, that’s for sure.”

“Huh?” Azurill then looks around and gets nervous, slowly dawning on him what had now transpired. “My...big brother... My big brother’s following us, right? He’s coming soon?”

“Nope. Your big brother’s not coming. I’ll let you in on a little secret. This was all a trick. I deceived you.”

“Huh?!”

“But let’s not dwell on that. There’s a little favor I need to ask. See that hold behind you?” I notice at the far end of the plateau, there’s a large rock wall with a tiny hole at the end, no more than two feet across. Azurill turns around to look for himself. “Well... There’s a rumor that there’s a trove of thief treasure inside there! But as you can see, I’m too big to squirm my way through that hole. And that’s where you come in!”

Azurill gets extremely worried, and turns back to Drowzee. Watching this, I feel like a rock is sinking into my stomach, and I bet Rayne feels the same way.

“Don’t worry. Just do as I say. Do that, then I’ll help you get back out of there.”

“B-But...” Azurill’s on the verge of tears at this point. He jumps back, shaking like a leaf.

“Go on, get going!” Drowzee retorts, taking a step closer. “Go into that hole. And don’t forget to bring back the treasure!”

“I want my big brother!” Azurill begins to cry, running off.

“H-Hey, stop that!” Drowzee cuts Azurill’s escape off, outspeeding him. “Sheesh! I said that I’ll take you home when you’re done! If you keep being difficult, it will mean big trouble for you!”

“H-H-H-...HELP!”

That was it! That was exactly what my vision showed me! There was no time to waste now; it was time to attack. I bolted forward, running through the air, and with a scream of “DYNAMIC ENTRY!” I kicked Drowzee across the face, then pivoted back through the air to land behind, in a fighting pose, ready for action. Rayne followed close behind, and we were both side by side.



“Stop right there!” Rayne yells, quite angry. “We won’t let you do that! Drowzee, you bully!”

“H-How did you find this place?!” Drowzee exclaims, clearly shocked he was found out.

“We’re Team SOLO!” I explain. “We appear to help those in need! You thought you wouldn’t be found out? Well, sir, you were wrong!”

“An exploration team!? You came to apprehend... Huh? Are you...trembling?”

“What? No, I’m...” I look to my side and see Rayne, who despite putting on a brave face is visibly shaking, as if she’s having trouble even standing up. I know that shake. That’s the shake of fear and uncertainty. That was my cue to stand strong, to put on the brave face she can’t.

“A-ha! I’ve figured it out!” Drowzee exclaimed. “You say you’re on an exploration team, but you’re total rookies!”

“Rookies or not, why do you care?” I demand. “You’re still an outlaw.”

“Heh. That’s right, I’m a wanted Pokémon with a bounty on my head. But can you two do the job? Can you confront this outlaw and bring him to justice?”

“Whether or not we can is irrelevant. We have to! There is no ‘can’ about it! Make no mistake, we will take you down!” My words must have had some kind of effect, because at that moment, Rayne stopped shaking and spoke up loudly.

“Of course we will!” Rayne yelled. “We’d never lose to a bad guy like you!”

“Ha ha ha!” Drowzee began to laugh. “I’ve been chased by all sorts of exploration teams in my day...but never a sorrier-looking bunch than you two!”

“Then I suppose it’ll be all the more humiliating when we beat you,” I retort, a grin creeping across my face.

“This should be a laugh. Let’s see if you can take me down. Show me what you’ve got!”

I start by getting into a defensive stance as Drowzee begins to approach us, just in case I need to roll with the punches. Right as Drowzee draws near, I lunge at him with my teeth and bite down, but I don’t lunge far enough, and fall short. The Drowzee laughs at me as I mess up, though Rayne takes advantage of the opening and flicks her tails across his face. This annoys him enough that he decides to use some kind of mental attack on Rayne, and it hurts quite a bit. She isn’t exactly in a critical state, but I can tell she’s hurting – another one of those and she’s out. That’s why I saved the Reviver Seed.

I try again, and this time I hit. The Drowzee screams, its body deeply wounded by the bite mark, and Rayne sneaks in for another attack that hit spot-on. It looked just as powerful as the bite, so I’m surprised when she learned how to do that. Drowzee’s really annoyed at this point and ends up paralyzing Rayne, causing her to stumble to her feet.

She’s breathing heavily and is basically out of the fight, so from here on out it’ll have to be just me. I bite into his hide again, causing even more pain and making him even angrier. He decides to capitalize on that by giving Rayne a big slap across the face, while she’s unable to defend herself.

“You hit her while she’s down!?” I scream. “You despicable scumbag!!” He’s about to hit her again, but before it landed, I quickly whip out an Oran berry from within my satchel and throw it straight into Rayne’s mouth, letting her swallow it before she falls victim to the punch. She still can’t battle but I know she’ll be fine. I bite at him one more time and he slumps forward with a yell of anger, the fight completely drained from him.

I slap Rayne about a bit until she’s capable of moving around, and ask her to check on Azurill. I tap the rescue badge to communicate with the guild, telling them I’ve captured an outlaw at Mt. Bristle and request a follow-up. Chatot is the one who answers, and says he’ll contact the police right away. Rayne makes sure that Azurill isn’t hurt and is well enough to move, and then Rayne and I drag Drowzee’s body back down the mountain.

When we get to the base, Marill is waiting for us, along with two Magnemite being led by a Magnezone with a bronze coloration. He was also wearing what looked like a fedora, which I found rather unusual. Wait, this Magnezone, it couldn’t be...could it?

“Ah, so you’re the two who chased after Drowzee!” the Magnezone began. “I’m the primary officer in this region. Thanks to you, we have been able to catch a wanted outlaw! We owe you great thanks for your cooperation!” As he spoke, the Magnemite moved to either side of Drowzee, each one holding an arm.

“It was no problem, sir,” I reply. “Nice fedora, by the way.”

“You think so? Thanks! I had a friend pick it out for me. It looks much better than a cop hat, don’t you agree?”

“Yes... It just reminds me of someone I met once before. You reminded me of him...”

“In any case, we have to take this outlaw in. We will send the reward to your guild. Thank you again!”

The three police officers then lead away Drowzee and leave, presumably to lock him up somewhere, or perform community service. I’m honestly not sure; it’s never clear where the outlaws are taken. Is there a prison somewhere far off, or is it some kind of rehabilitation regime accompanied by some form of community service? Next time I see that Magnezone, I’ll probably have to ask him...as well as what his name is. I think it might be...him.



“Azurill!”

“Marill!”

Cue the hugs, tears, and consolation. Rayne and I remain quiet. They deserve this moment.

“You did all this for us, Rayne and DNA,” Marill said, trying to hold back tears. It takes a lot to be strong in times like those, but if he’d cried too we wouldn’t have thought any less of him. “We won’t forget what you did for us. Thank you so much.” He nudged his younger brother. “Come on, Azurill. You too.”

“Yup,” Azurill nodded, still crying. “Thank you very much! Thank you for rescuing me!”

“Really... Really, thank you!”

“You’re...You’re welcome,” I said, not used to receiving compliments. “You’d best hurry home quick! Don’t let your mother be worried.”

The two of them ran off, presumably back home, to tell their mother all that had happened this day. From the gift of an apple, to kidnapping, to a daring rescue... Those two had been through a lot today. A rest would be well-deserved. We began to head back well, and Rayne started walking, until I reminded her that we had a teleporter that could take us straight back home.

Man, this badge is convenient.

“Ah, hello, you two!” It was Chatot. We’d warped back into the guild lobby, as usual.

“Hey, Chatot. Sorry to ditch Bidoof like that, but we saw the outlaw earlier in the day and wanted to follow up the lead before he got away.”

“No worries, DNA! The Magnezone explained the situation to me. He was most grateful! He asked that I expand the space of your Treasure Bag as well, as thanks! Shazam!!”

As Chatot spoke the magic word, my satchel glowed ever so briefly. It appeared the same size as before, but I looked inside and noticed there were a few extra spaces to store things. By my estimate, it’d be enough to hold twenty-four items, instead of the usual sixteen.

“I’ve also gotten the bounty for the captured outlaw!” he continued, chirping. “Well done, you two! Here’s your share for the job. It’s yours to keep!” It was 300 gold coins. No doubt the actual bounty was ten times that, but I’m not complaining. Every little bit helps.

“DNA, how long is Chatot going to deny us our lifetime supply of apples?” Rayne asked me.

“Reviver Seeds cost as much as 16 apples and they’re infinitely more useful. They’re enough to bring one back from the brink of death.”

“Yeah, but we can actually buy apples.”

“I’m guessing the concept of ‘saving money’ is foreign to you.”

“And that’s why you’re the team leader! If it were me I’d just squander our money on whatever looked the most interesting. You have a discerning eye for cool stuff, you know!”

“Heh, thanks sis.”

I then heard a low growling noise.

“Ha ha, your stomach growled,” I pointed at Rayne. It was promptly followed by another low growling noise.

“Yours did too!” Rayne pointed back. Then we both collapsed on the floor laughing like a pair of idiots until they rang the dinner bell. It was a good thirty seconds of laughter.

The dinner appeared to be mostly the same, though with a few minor variations. I didn’t care; it tasted amazing. In fact, it tasted even better than yesterday, because I wasn’t as hungry then as I am now. I tried to pace myself, but I didn’t do so well; I was so anxious to get nutrients into my body that I ate as fast as I could manage without flubbing up. Rayne was still temporarily a vacuum with eyes, but even more intense due to the hunger. Obviously, any banter would have to wait until after dinner and before sleep.



I was staring listlessly out the window in our room. The rain was really coming down, making the air smell as it normally does after a downpour. I could also hear the thunder afar off and see a few flashes of lightning. It was a lot like how I entered this world, honestly. It was storming then, as I recall. Rayne was sitting next to me, looking out the window as well...though that wasn’t entirely true; while I was looking out at the thunderstorm, she was looking up at me.

“Hey, bro? What are you thinking about right now? You seem pensive.”

“Do you know what that word means, sis?”

“Not exactly, but I’ve heard you say it a few times, so it sounds about right.”

“Well, you’re right this time. I’m mostly thinking about how nice the shelter is. Not only is the work a bit easier than I thought it would be, but...it’s well-protected. I’m glad Finch decided to take us on, honestly.”

“I am too. But I’m gladder that you showed up. This place would be pretty boring for me if I didn’t have a friend to enjoy it with. And you’re so responsible! You make sure we’re well-taken care of and everything. I couldn’t have asked for better, honestly.”

“You think so? Heh, thanks. I really appreciate the company too; you make things pretty exciting as well...sometimes too much for my own good. I’ve fallen on my face quite a bit with you being responsible, but it’s worth it since it makes you laugh.”

“Heh, nice to see you’re thinking about me even when you’re being goofy.”

“Yeah. ...Though, come to think of it, there was something else on my mind.”

“Oh? What’s that?”

“Over dinner, I heard Chatot and a few of the apprentices talking with each other. I was listening to their conversation, and I found it quite enthralling. It had to do with the space-time problem.”

“Oh yeah, like how he mentioned a bunch of mystery dungeons and time getting all wonky?”

“Yeah. He believes something called the Time Gears are somehow involved.”

“A Time Gear? You know what that is?”

“I didn’t, so I asked Chatot, and he was kind enough to explain. He says Time Gears are hidden in secret secluded places, such as a forest, an underground lake, or even a volcano. They’re supposed to keep time stabilized in their area. He thinks they might have been disturbed.”

“You think they might have been stolen by an outlaw or something?”

“I thought so as well, so I asked Chatot what the odds were. He said slim to none, because it’s a long-held belief that, when a Time Gear is removed, time stops in that area, which may very well lead to a disaster. That’s why even the hardest of criminals don’t go after them.”

“Do you think he’s right?”

“I’d like to believe that. I’m not saying he’s wrong, but the only way I could know for sure is to see for myself. I certainly hope they’re fine...but...now I can’t stop thinking about it!”

“I don’t want you worrying about it. You’ll stay up all night if you dwell on it. One of these days, hey, we might get to investigate the Time Gears for ourselves. And what a book that would be! Imagine – we brave through stormy nights and gusty deserts to catch a glimpse of a Time Gear, a wonder of nature in its own right and an item of unparalleled beauty!”

“Now you just make me want to find a Time Gear just so you can get a look at it for yourself.”

“Thanks! But that’s just something for later. Maybe when we have a bit more freedom as an exploration team, we can go out one day and find a Time Gear.”

“Hm, yeah. Tell you what – when I get the chance, I’ll go take you to see one. Sound good?”

“Sure!” She gave me a high-five. “You got yourself a deal!”

“Awesome. Now get some sleep. I still have to record all this in the journal and you still need to wake up early tomorrow.”

“You’re not going to drop water in my ear again, are you?”

“If Loudred’s yelling doesn’t wake you up, I may not have a choice. See you in the morning.”



Elsewhere, deep in a forest, in the middle of the storm, something was stirring. Something was moving, bound, determined, set on a course. It wasn’t random – it was organized, spurred on by sheer force of will. A shadowy figure darted down a path deep into the heart of the forest, stopping at nothing to reach its center, secluded from the outside world. It was tall, bipedal, and moved with the precision and speed of a samurai.

Very few had ever been here. Even when the figure arrived, the only footprints it discerned were its own. There was no mistaking it – this one was the only thing alive around here. On its journey, too, it discerned nothing else, either by sight or by sound. Except, that is, for one singular object that stood directly in front of its field of vision...

“Do my eyes deceive me?” Its voice was calm, with a slight air of dignity and respect. “Yes, it is! I’ve finally found it! A Time Gear! But...this is only the first of many...”

No, but I can guess.

"I'm back from vacations"

Lost it at the smeargle thing, it's very great!

[Back to Top]



“UP AND AT ‘EM! IT’S MORNING!”

I wonder when I’m ever going to get used to that. Probably not for a long time. So until I do, my ears will have to deal with the perpetual ringing noise. Rayne is still fast asleep, as always completely oblivious to Loudred’s yelling, so I repeat the water-in-the-ear trick and it works just as well as it did yesterday. She gives me a look – not one of anger or frustration, but one of resignation, as if accepting she had to wake up.

“AND...THREE! SMILES GO FOR MILES!”

The morning chant, or rather cheer, was the same as it always was. It served as a mini pep rally, but also helped to squeeze any remaining drops of drowsiness out of the newbies like us. If ever I was a little sleepy while dragging my feet on the way to the main room, I wasn’t now. Rayne would take a tiny bit more effort than that, but she was mostly awake. And then, after the usual morning business and a final yell of “HOORAY!”, we scattered.

“Ah, you two!”

“Yes?” I answered. I was beginning to recognize the trademark chirp.

“Let me give you your assignment for today.” He took a clipboard from beside him and began looking it over, presumably to find our names and issue us some task, menial or otherwise. “Look up jobs on the Job Bulletin Board and the Outlaw Notice Board. Do the listed jobs. That will do for today!”

“So I assume we have freedom to choose which jobs we please?”

“Yes, that’s correct. Understood? No shirking your work, OK?”

“Yessir. Rayne, you ready to go? ...Rayne?”

No reply. Oh crap; where’d she run off to this time? I looked back and forth, all around me, craning my neck as far as I could. Fortunately, Rayne was enthralled looking out the window, with the view of the cliff below. That’s good; I thought she was in actual trouble for a bit.

“Oh, there you are,” I said, joining her.

“Yeah, I was just enjoying the view. I was thinking...What if there’s a giant safety net at the bottom of this cliff? Just in case someone falls out a window, will they be all right? Can they be carried to safety?”

“I honestly don’t think so. Look at how the windows are positioned. There’s about a foot of space, then the window pane, and then another foot. The window cavities are two feet thick; there’s no way to accidentally fall out of one. The only way to fall out the window is to purposely crawl out of it.”

“Aw. Still, it’d be cool if there was a trampoline or something at the bottom! Then we could go bouncing around just in case we fall, and we could get exercise too!”

“You think of the strangest things.”

“Oh! I had an even better idea! We could go rappelling! This cliff could make for a really cool rappel site! You could just hook the gear up to the top of the face and then go jumping down!”

“And how exactly are we going to get back up?”

“I already covered that!”

“The trampoline and safety net don’t exist. I wanted an actual reason. You didn’t say one.”

“...huh! You’re right! I must think of one, and then we’ll go rappelling!”

“First let’s go snag some jobs. Hopefully Chatot won’t get mad at us and you’ll be too distracted by the jobs that you’ll be too focused on adventure to think about rappelling.”

“What makes you think I’ll forget about rappelling?”

“Our team gets upgrades.”

“We can DO that!?”

“Oh, didn’t Chatot tell you? The more jobs that we do, the more prestige that we as a rescue team will earn, and the tougher jobs we’ll be able to take on! It’s like a snowball effect, but instead of snowballs, it’s goodie bags!”

“He never told me that!”

“You were probably too distracted looking out the window to notice. Anyway, we have a deal?”

“Yes we do, mister!”

Chatot never actually said that; I just said that to stroke his ego. He was within earshot, after all.

Now that I had Rayne sufficiently enticed away from the thought of rappelling, it was time to look at the job boards. Dugtrio had apparently been here already, and so had a lot of other teams; the number of requests to choose from was rather small today. I took a peek at the Outlaw Board, but of the ones that were remaining, they were so out of our league I didn’t even want to think about it. There were a few normal jobs there though, so I snagged a few off of there and took the flyers along with us. I’d be doing this at least once a day, so I developed my system – I put the flyers with the Wonder Map to ensure I wouldn’t forget about the jobs.

“So, where are we going today?” Rayne asked me.

“It’s best to start small, so I picked a few that were easy-ish for us. We’ll be going to the Beach Cave.”

“Ah, the cave! That place was really pretty! I can stop to relax and enjoy the scenery a bit, since we’re not chasing down that Relic Fragment again! The pink floor, the shadows of the water on the wall, the glistening sunlight from gaps in the ceiling...DNA, let’s go right away!”

“...I think we can do that, yes. In future, I’ll want to stop by the storage each day to set aside the rest of the items we don’t need, but given how we can carry quite a bit of stuff with us, this shouldn’t be too big of a worry.”

We were walking down the dirt road that led out from the guild. The plan was to head straight down to the beach and take on our jobs, of which we had two to handle today. I was expecting to head straight to the cove with no strange occurrences whatsoever (excluding those caused either directly or indirectly by Rayne), but my expectations were dashed to pieces when I saw a Spinda carry on a conversation with a nearby rock.

I was somewhat concerned to ask if the Spinda was drunk or not, as it was speaking rather fast and most of its speech was unintelligible. In fact, even as we walked past, it didn’t even seem to notice us. All the words I could pick up were “Hopes and dreams... This is...” before we were gone.

And I was reminded of how unpleasant it was to have sand on my feet. I was dashing across the sand to make it to the cave entrance and out of the sand, and Rayne was doing much the same thing. Clearly, neither of us liked sand.

“So, DNA, what’s on the agenda for today? Beat up some baddies? Swashbuckling duels? Dive to the bottom of the water to snag a rare and priceless treasure?”

“Nothing too extravagant today, I’m afraid. We’re supposed to find and rescue a Kabuto who’s worried and lost, and pick up a Cheri Berry someone misplaced.”

“But that’s so BORING! Can’t we at least fight some baddies?”

“Maybe tomorrow. It depends on if they have one we can reasonably take. For now, let’s just take baby steps.”

“Do I look like a baby to you?”

“I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may implicate me.”

“Aw, bro, don’t be mean...”

“I’m kidding. Of course you don’t look like a baby. You’re just short.”

I staggered and nearly fell forward as she tackled me from behind. I once again felt her full weight on my shoulders, except this time she was awake.

“You’re funny when you silly, you know that, DNA?”

“I could say the same of you. Now step back before I break my shoulder.”

“Hey, isn’t that...?”

Rayne pointed ahead of me, though she still hadn’t gotten off my shoulders yet. She was pointing straight at a Pokémon, who appeared to be walking around in circles and lamenting. It was flat, with a brown shell on its back, and four yellow claws to walk around with. No other details could really be seen, but it seemed to have two large red eyespots on its underside.

“That’s the guy we’re supposed to rescue, right?”

“That’s what it says in the job description.”

“What’s he saying?”

“Don’t know.” I cupped my hand in front of my ear to get a good listen.

“No one cares about me...I’m just a worthless protoplasm...”

“Wait, what?” My voice was lowered, still trying to tune into its words.

“Life is but a moment, a meaningless grain of sand...”

“Whoever it is, it sounds depressed enough to be suicidal.”



“Excuse me,” I stated, having approached the Kabuto, announcing my presence and clearing my throat. “You were the one that posted the request, correct?”

“What’s the point...” it mumbled. “Just get rid of me now...”

I couldn’t think of a good response. I simply tapped my badge as a light shone out, taking the Kabuto out and back to safety. It had lowered its voice to a mumble again, speaking nonsense about how awful it was and everything around him. It was enough to depress me just listening to him, and the instant it left, I felt better. That was...really weird.

I found the Cheri Berry, fortunately, so with that we decided to head back. The incredibly negative Kabuto was there, handing us the rest of its money, moaning about how everything was pointless so he might as well get rid of it all. The other client was a bit more thankful, and handed us a pink Gummi. Rayne called dibs on it because she thought it was strawberry-flavored, but I told her that she’d like cherry flavor much better. It convinced her.

I know it’s technically ‘red’ flavor, but I don’t think jelly beans are worth splitting hairs over.

“Hm? What’s this?” I noticed that our badge looked a little different. After unpinning it from my shirt, I turned it around and noticed small numbers on the other side. It appeared to have a display like one would see in the odometer of an old car – several numbers all lined up next to each other, with teeth in the side to move them forward. There appeared to be two rows of five digits each; above each were tiny words in black capital letters – the top row said ‘CURRENT:’, while the bottom said ‘TO NEXT:’. The numbers themselves? 20 and 100, respectively.

Oh, and near the top, the name ‘SOLO’ was also printed in black letters, but no one cares.

“Notice something, DNA?”

“Yeah, check this out!” I show her the back of our badge.

“Solo twenty one-hundred? Is that our serial number now?”

“I think it has to do with our rank. At least now I know how it’s quantified!”

“...we’re rank 20 out of 100?”

“Ah, not quite. See the little words ‘Current’ and ‘To Next’? We have 20 points right now, and we need 100 to increase our exploration’s team rank.”

“Ah, okay, I think I got it! So what rank are we right now?”

“Normal Rank.”

There was a short pause. “Normal is boring! We must rectify this post-haste! DNA! We must do more missions and get a better rank! None of this boring ‘Normal’ nonsense. We are far from normal! We need to look it! Who’s with me!?”

“I am.”

“Who else!?”

“Rayne, there’s no one else in the room. The dinner bell ran in the middle of your speech. Everyone’s eating.”

“What? And they left us behind? We cannot turn our backs on our dinners, which are better than apples! Come, ward! Witty banter and full stomachs await!”

And then she jumped down the ladder. I wonder if she snuck some sugar while I wasn’t looking.





I was sitting cross-legged on my round straw bed, jotting down our day’s adventures in our logbook. Nothing stood out as particularly remarkable, between the very depressing Kabuto and the lack of any new announcements at the start of the day, our daily excursion for now was rather uneventful. In fact, I had finished writing it, and Rayne was still wide awake.

“You’re done?” she asked me.

“Yeah. There wasn’t much we did today, so there wasn’t much to write down.”

“But what about my great speech about how we must challenge the label of ‘normal’?”

“Sis, that was the only exciting thing that happened to us all day. I got it, sure, but there was nothing else worth writing about.”

“Then clearly I need to give more inspirational speeches! The fanbase will love it!”

“Fanbase? What fanbase? There’s only the two of us.”

“Well, you never know! When all our adventures are said and done, so many others will have a chance to read of our wonderful deeds!”

“...yeah...”

“What’s wrong, bro? You’re oddly quiet.”

I closed the logbook, put it back in my satchel, and got up, walking over to the window and crossing my arms behind my back, in contemplation. I didn’t reply, so Rayne had to prod me for another response.

“Was it something I said?”

“Kinda, yeah, though it’s not your fault. You said ‘when all our adventures are said and done’, right?”

“Yeah...”

“Well...I see no less than two problems with that statement. First, they might never end. The chronicles of SOLO might go on forever. And if that happens, I run the risk of writing the same old thing over and over again, if I haven’t done so already.”

“It can’t be that soon for reruns, can it? But what’s the second problem?”

“Even if they do end...how does it end? With our death? Retirement? And are we ever going to make it back to our world? We have friends back home too, Rayne. If time is passing there like it is here, they’re going to be worried sick, and we’ve no way of contacting them.”

“What if they’re watching and reading all this? What if everyone is watching these events play out in real time? What if your logbook got sent into the past and they’re reading it all right now as all of this cool stuff happens?”

“I can only hope that’s what’s going on.”



“I know what you mean, though. I want to go home too. And I don’t know how we’re going to get there. But you know what I think?”

“What’s that?” I hadn’t moved from my position. The night was still as dark as ever, save for the moonlight shining down. I was being held captive by my own thoughts and worries. I didn’t even notice Rayne walk up next to me and gaze out the window as well.

“I know that, no matter how it ends up, we’re going to be okay. Even if we’re here for months or years on end, it’s going to be fun. And then we’ll go back home, and we’ll have so many stories to share!”

“What makes you think we’ll even make it back? What makes you think we won’t be stuck here forever?”

She grabbed my upper arm and yanked it. This forced me to turn in her direction, and what I saw was unsettling – she was staring right at me. No, not at me; she seemed to be staring into my soul through my eyes. I couldn’t look away; my gaze was trapped.

“Just trust me,” she told me, in a voice so solemn and serious, at first I couldn’t believe it was her. The flashback to my arrival here returned to me loud and clear.

“I guess it’s my turn, now, isn’t it?”

“I trust you to keep me safe and wake me up every morning when I sleep in. Now you need to trust me to find a way back home.”

“...You’re right.”

Well, that was an ‘aww’ moment.

“You’re going to be all right, DNA?”

“Yeah, I am. I just needed to put things in perspective. Thanks for that. We need to rest up for tomorrow. I’ll make sure we have more jobs for us to shrug off the ‘Normal Rank’.”

“That’s the spirit! See you tomorrow!”

We were both out like lights, which I found surprising. I’d have to write all this in the book tomorrow. I was still a bit concerned we weren’t going to make it back, but I had a bit more peace of mind than I did before this conversation ended. It’s weird how Rayne is both the source of and cure to several of my thought problems. I’d say that talking to her less would prevent the problems from coming up, but they were going to come up eventually. We’d still have to find a way out, of course, but...I was a bit more confident we’d find one this time.

And the sappy alarm in my brain is going off, so that’s my cue to shut up and cut this chapter off.

Wait, I can’t? I still have more jobs to report on? Oh, fine, if you insist.



I think my sleep schedule was finally starting to acclimate. While it was Loudred’s yell that caused me to be fully alert as usual, I had begun to shake off my sleep about ten seconds before I heard his cry. In similar fashion, Rayne was no longer fast asleep after hearing Loudred; she became groggy instead, so I could get away with shaking her awake instead of dropping water slowly in her ear.

That’s good for her, but bad for me. I liked pulling that prank.

After the morning mustering and declaration of duties (we were told to just grab bulletins off boards as usual), Rayne issued me an ultimatum.

“All right, DNA!” she began. “Today, we have to go after at least one outlaw!”

“Hopefully they won’t be sturdier than that Drowzee,” I answer. “It’s going to be pretty hellish to arrest someone who’s way out of our league.”

Spoiler alert: It doesn’t go as well as intended.



“A lot of the jobs today seem to relate to Mount Bristle,” she notices. “Hey look! There’s a Kabuto thief who fled there! We can take him while we’re at it!”

“Seems like a good idea. Let’s see what else we can find...okay, wow. We’re going to have our hands full today. Rayne, how do you feel about taking five jobs at once today?”

“Five!? Yes please! That’s hardly a normal thing to do! In fact, it’s downright amazing! What’s the limit?”

“Exploration teams are only permitted to hold on to eight jobs at once.”

“Then let’s do eight one day! I can’t wait! But for now let’s stick with the five. What do we need to do?”

“The first one starts halfway up, on the fifth floor, and we need to rescue someone. Each job thereafter is on the following floor, until we get to the top. We need to get back a stolen item from the outlaw, find a berry someone dropped, rescue someone else, and finally give a Big Apple to an explorer waiting for us there. The outlaw is the only tricky one; other than that, all of these jobs are easily done.”

“Then what are we waiting for? Let’s sort out our things and go on our awesome excursion!”

I was steadily working myself into the ritual – deposit in storage what I don’t need, withdraw what I do, and then set off to do whatever jobs we snagged on the way out. While we pass the crossroads, the Spinda is still there mumbling, talking to the rock. Rayne and I talk amongst ourselves, wondering if that Spinda has been there the whole time. ...Spinda are crazy. The answer is most likely ‘yes’. Not worth thinking about, though, so we’re off.

I was clearly not prepared for this.

“Hit ‘em harder, DNA!”

“I’m trying, Rayne! But he’s curled up in his shell and I can barely dent him!”

“Then start throwing rocks at him! You have the bag; I’ll just slap him around for a while!”

On the plus side, the Kabuto was a coward and bolted the instant it saw us, backing itself into a corner when another hostile was coming from the opposite direction, and the two of them were too stupid to work out their differences and pass each other. On the minus side, any damage we dealt to it was minimal, so it took a lot of time. A LOT of time.

I’ll spare you the details, but I lost track of how many Geo Pebbles I threw at it. Rayne also got to witness first-hand my getting resuscitated by a Reviver Seed. To her, it was the greatest thing ever. It was like magic. In fact, she picked up every seed she could find and asked it to be magical. You can guess how well that went. Thankfully, she didn’t eat any of them.

Each of the five jobs had the client reward us with a Gummi of some kind. I could just see Rayne’s eyes widen, with all of that sugar passing before her. I had to restrain her so she wouldn’t go into diabetic shock.

After that was all taken care of, our team badge began talking. I held it up, with the back facing me, and noticed the numbers now said 130 / 300.

“Congratulations!” it began. The voice was generic and indistinct, most likely a recording. “Team SOLO has moved up from the Normal Rank to the Bronze Rank!”

“It talks!?” Rayne replied. “It talks, counts, and teleports!? It’s just like Star Trek!”

“To reward your efforts, your allotted storage space has increased from 64 to 96 items. A Sitrus Berry has also been shipped to your storage! You will receive another announcement like this once you reach 300 points. Keep up the good work!” Then all was silent.

“DNA, that was so cool! Pinch me, I must be dreaming!”

I did as asked.

“Ow! My shoulder!”

“Well, pinching does hurt. Oh, huh, look at that. The jewel on the front is green now, instead of pink. It must change color with each rank-up.”

“Excellent! We are no longer normal, but bronze! But wait, the jewel is green! Bronze isn’t green! It’s like a bright browny color. Kinda like me! See, bronze is the perfect color.”

“When bronze ages and oxidizes, it turns green, though. It makes more sense than you think!”

“Wow, thanks, DNA! I learned something today!”

And now you can take away the piece of information that bronze turns green as it oxidizes.



Starting at the end of this chapter, I will post a short synopsis of where Team SOLO presently stands, in terms of planned permanent team members (it’s just going to be us two for a while, so don’t expect a lot), their levels (which may not be totally accurate as I don’t constantly keep track of them), our rescue team’s rank, our current points, how many points we need for the following rank, as well as our satchel’s size. (I’m not going to put down storage size, since that is tied to rank, whereas bag size is tied to plot progress.) This will save me having to put down rank and points every time they significantly change.

Team SOLO So Far:

DNA lv. 11
Rayne lv. 11

Bronze Rank (130 / 300)
Bag Size: 24

dangit >_<

They're called rescue teams in PMD1, and exploration teams in PMD2. I'm trying to keep reminding myself of that wording, and in most places I do. That must be one of the few places where it slips through the cracks.

(PMD1 had a focus more on saving Pokemon in need; PMD2 had a focus more on exploring the unknown. Given how the main mechanic of the game is the same in both, 'rescue team' makes more sense. But I digress.)

Thanks for pointing that out. I'll edit that in the Word document accordingly.

Edit: I did a Ctrl+F in Word, and found that there were five other instances I said 'rescue team' before chapter 6. I changed them all to 'exploration team' or simply 'team', and I'm surprised no one noticed. I found zero after chapter 6.

...so I think we're okay now.

There won't be TOO many like it, no. I think this was the only one so far, and even then it only takes up half the chapter. In fact, the whole reason I put the team data at the end of each chapter (I wasn't originally planning to do so at all, which is why ch.6 is the first time it appears) is so I can hand-wave stuff - so I probably will have stuff that just says 'we went on many missions over the next few days'.

Oh, fun fact: the transition from Silver to Gold Rank is the largest point spike in EOS, going from 300 (Silver) to 1600 (Gold) - yes, I'm aware a 1300-point difference isn't the highest requirement to rank up, but it is the largest spike, especially since you can get Silver Rank very early in the game, and with little effort.

...actually, that's not entirely true. Getting the highest rank (in EOT/D and EOS) has the largest spike; while it's partially mitigated by the fact that you will be doing nothing but high-scoring missions by then (especially in EOS, but less so in EOT/D), it's still pretty big.

In EOT/D, to get Hyper Rank (the penultimate rank) requires 15000 points, and the last one, Master Rank, requires a whopping 77777 points total (so, a 62K+ gap).
In EOS it's a bit different; Master Rank+3 requires 25000 points, and Guildmaster Rank requires 100000 points (a 75K+ point gap).
With scaling it amounts to almost the same, since in EOS missions give out about 20% more points, give or take.

You can tell I like the game because of how much I talk about it and how much I know. I really have a passion for PMD1 and 2. Not so much 3. I poked fun at a friend of mine for playing it.

"But it's Mystery Dungeon!"
"It's Gates to Infinity, man! Git gud!"

I won the argument.

Yea... Gates to Infinity. They could have kept the same graphics but like mix the best from Explorers of Sky and B/R Rescue Team but no, they decided to create a boring free-2-play game. -_- It's a shame that such a great serie had only two great generations.

I know Blue Rescue Team like my pocket. I've been thinking about trying to do a speedrun of it for some times... I might create a thread with all the info. (So basically I need a grass type for bullet-seeding and either Charmander or Cyndaquil for smokescreen.

How dare you steal my publicity

Go for it. I won't stop you.

Any updates to come? There havenn't been any since 1 week. ;_;